TRIUMPH...

[Music Starts]

[N]
Ladies and gentlemen...

[N]
As I hit the ground running, air maxes hit the deck
My thoughts wander as I take another breath [Breathe In]
I aint tryna be politically correct
But, I wont rest till I'm given my respect...
The vision is PRESET on the money I get...
We don't speak the same so again I digress
I aint just coming for the top, I'm aiming for the neck... [Keep Going]
Still hungry, How dare they say I'm jealous or vexed?
13 weeks I had my teeth deep in the jugular of success
Got far away from VA but drama seems to follow MORE OR LESS
I did it my way, I dont need no help
Realize these 09' brothas gotta do it ourselves...
They say the only thing to fear is FEAR itself...
I gave FEAR a STONE COLD STUNNER and reclaimed my belt
I'm cocky, confident that nobody can stop me
A new found found swagger that was bred by the USMC
Najee, not Na-Jay... Modern day WALE
Got the straight leg jeans, Famous hoodie draped over my body
So get it right, I'm balling... No TESTICLES
If LIFE's a bitch... Then I put her on a PEDASTAL
I don't think you know what you getting into
I'm Michael Vick, Wanna Bark? Then yall through...



[N]
25, 25, 25 can I get 30?
I'm dressing fresh to death, but my social life is in security...
Damn, yall gay like Burt and [ERNIE]...
Seduced by fly sistas who swallow everything like [KIRBY]
I refused to be seduced by temptation...
Besides, yall really got no conversation
There's one pair of lips I wanna kiss...
Hoes got me as they last wish on they bucket list
Well hit the road [JACK], cause I'm FREE-MAN...
You mad cuz you a SLUMDOG... and I'm a millionaire.
Girls get so syced over the internet
BM tryna block my shot, but I still hit NOTHING BUT NET
Go ahead and feel that... Chillin in my LA Dodger fitted cap...
I'm just tryna show you where my focus at
Out of sight, out of mind I leave the past in the back
Dont smoke, but still drink like a Dizzy Ras-
Cal, so FIX UP, LOOK SHARP yo
I got no plans of losing or goin broke yo...
Looking back, I thought life was so rough...
But now I laugh... It's funny when you TRIUMPH...

"I [HATE] TO SAY I TOLD YOU SO" - The Hives

Remember, I wrote a blog a cpl days ago mentioning Drake and Jay on The Blueprint 3? Remember I said that DRAKE's career would be DEFINED by THIS SONG? Don't remember? Scroll up and read what I said. I won't even repeat that shit. Needless to say, I heard the song "Off That" produced by Timbaland [Great Beat!] and I was... left wanting. I was underwhelmed... There isn't even a DRAKE verse, only him on the hook. And I said it... I said it. I wont even repeat it... So you know... There. I'm done...

"I Think I Love Her... I Know I Love Her!" - Gucci Mane

Carmen Hayes... Ugh! She reminds me [almost] every other night why I enjoy [PORN].

"I'll Sleep When You're Dead"

This album sums up my stay in Virginia. I truly love this album. Before I moved up there, I never heard of El-P. I had heard of Def Jux [a label] but never really paid attention. It wasn't until I moved and met some cool cats who knew their shit about music [which I rarely meet] and they introduced me to El-P. "I'll Sleep When You're Dead" basically summerizes a fcked up time I had in VA when I was homeless, just wildin out, and a bunch of other shit. When I finally moved back to SC, I listened to the album again and almost broke down in tears. "Poisonville Kids/No Wins" is my favorite song on the album. "Flyentology" is a close 2nd. But "Poisonville" just really brings me back to a dark, dark time I was goin thru... I encourage all people to listen to the album... I even have one of em on my blog.

Listen and "Pay Attention"...

-Shouts out to Allen, Dave, Brittany, Sarah and Brent [BEDSAC and Co] for introducing me to some real shit. I appreciate you all for being GREAT FRIENDS... and pioneers in MUSIC.

Where The FCK Is Charles Hamilton? [Briana Latrise]

Okay, Yall know how much a dude likes [BRIANA LATRISE]. I think she's fly, outspoken and dare I say it? [REAL]? Yeah, she's that. Yall kinda know her resume': She punched Charles Hamilton [WTF is that cat? More Later....], she's Mary J's husband's kid blah, blah, blah... But she's a really cool person. Just check her blog [brianalatrise.blogspot.com] and see for ya self. But for now, check her thoughts on where is Charles Hamilton and a lot of other stuff. I think she's like the only non-celebrity in social circles who I like... DIG.
Okay, on with the show...

Oh. My. God. [HOV]!

Hits Newsstands Next Month...

"Yeah Buddy, I'm Good..."

This is The Clipse's new clothing line, "Play Cloths" and yes! I spelled that shit right! Mal and Pusha [along with designer KAWS] has put together a pretty tight ass collection. I'm loving it already! My cousin in DC already told me that they're NOT even selling it up there. But of course its in NORFOLK. Just look @ the clothes and decide for yourself.

"Who's Gonna RUN THIS TOWN Tonight?"

Looks like Jay got a solid album here. I apologize, a lot of blogsites is really on Jay's dick right now so I haven't really been speaking on BP:3 lately (But in slience... I'm patiently waiting). I'm looking forward hearing the WHOLE album, but just really hearing Jay match words and wit with dudes like Kid Cudi [Who is just DOPE to me], and of course [DRIZZY]. I feel that if DRAKE don't come hard on the song, then NO ONE is gonna buy "THANK ME LATER". I'm only kidding, but this song here is gonna let me whether or not DRAKE is as serious as alot of niggas [including me] say he is.

That is all.

"PAY ATTENTION!" [in my DJ DRAMA voice]

[HEAVEN] @ [NITE]...

My mind slips me...I wonder if I've met you in a [PAST] life.

Maybe you're what I dream about @ [NITE]

Maybe you're something that's [VANISHED] from sight...

But now that I've found you, I can't let you leave here...

You're [REAL], you've got to be...

I [CRAVE] your conversation... I [IMAGINE] your affection...

You got me [WAITING], ready in [ANTICIPATION] for your next call.

Until I finally hold you in my arms, you're not really mine.

You're a running [ILLUSION] & that's fine.

At least you're not just in my mind...Though you were run around it all the time.

I get confused with what to say.

Lose my grip? I just may.

But if I finally remember what I tried to say...

I know the girl for me is only one call away

I [DIAL]...

I press [SEND]...

I wait for an answer but...

All that's there to greet me is her... [VOICEMAIL]...

Once again, she's out of my sight...

This is my [HEAVEN] @ [NITE].

[I wrote this late one night last week...]

Bada-Ba-Ba-Ba....

Okay, so ever since I've seen this commercial I've been tryna find if theres a full version. Months past, and no cigar... So one night, me and my moms were in the kitchen making some cocoa and we were singing or humming what we thought were the lyrics to the song. I finally look again and I find the full minute version. And I LOVE IT! I've been a DWELE fan since I heard him with SLUM VILLAGE on "Tainted" [R.I.P Baatin and J DILLA] and I bought [and lost] his album "Subject" [Which is a bonafied CLASSIC joint. If you feelin' Raheem Devaughn, you'll feel DWELE]. So here it is... FOR YOU! "McCafe Mocha"!...

[808]'s & [HEARTBREAK]

A couple days ago, I was in my garage slash former apartment slash former room [for no particular reason mind you] and I found some sheets of papers I had lying around with some lyrics I had written for an album called "NRB". The thing about these particular sheets of papers is that they are completely uncomprehensible. Meaning that these sheets just have lines and lines that dont go with each other at all. They're just bars I thought up during the day or night and I'd write them down so I wouldn't forget em. I call it, [BRAINSTORMING]. Then I happened to find a song called, "In Search Of...". It was a song I was writing during the time where I was beefing with TJ, wasn't talking to CHRIS as much and me and TOYA were just going thru the motions, and pretty much was at the end of our relationship [These are just guest-imations].

But reading the song had me relive all of the things I was going thru at that time. I didn't know what was real at all. I doubted FRIENDSHIP, I lost faith in the RELATIONSHIP I was in and MUSIC in no way was helping me. All I had was my notepad and I jotted down every feeling I had. Then all of a sudden, March 1st [Easter] was a day I thought I had found LOVE. A love I had wanted for so long... I thought he had sent me LOVE in the form of SHAKIRA BALLARD. Ironically, he taught me about LOVE... and its HEARTBREAK, as I would go thru that with her. That would lead to more soul searching in my notebook. And as far as music, I didnt need to go far. Drake had every feeling I was going thru with "So Far Gone" . I said goodbye to every good thing I had, I put all my chips, I bet it all... And I lost big.

I'm not the one to label regrets... but every good thing goes away. So in a flurry of anger, I went outside, burnt a blunt I had left over... and set every last lyric of the ALBUM "NRB" on fire. I needed to do it. I needed to walk away from it all. I needed it. If not, I was gonna die. Thank you to my therapist, Trina for those long nights of me asking, "WTF is wrong with me..." Adrienne, for other reasons... A lot of people is gonna wonder what this blog was actually for... IDK...

After all, I just walked in my garage one day for no particular reason...

I think it was to put those lines I wrote so long ago... TOGETHER.

"It's Not Bout Being Afraid. Its About Being Realistic."

A smart person told me today thru text that, "When people fall in love... Its a gradual process. They meet for the first time. Exchange numbers... Go out a few times. They notice they enjoy each others complany alot so they start dating. The feelings come into play and make it exclusive. They begin to yearn for each other and realize they are falling in love. They need to be with each other, would do anything for the other and realize they are in love. Over time they spend more time with each other..." and I began to look for a .38 special to shoot myself in the head with.

While I don't neccessarily disagree with that sappy, hallmark, "The Notebook" type love, and I ask a question: What if you never had the chance to do that? What if a face to face never came into play? All you have is a phone and a computer for communication? Can't you still yearn? Can't feelings still come into play? Can't you still do anything for that person? Can't you still fall in LOVE? Now I understand, that while you may love talking to that person on the phone, you can when you meet in person... NOT click. Because to some people, Physical Interaction is key to a relationship.

But sometimes, you dont get to have physical interaction. What about people in jail? Yes, you get to see them thru a glass or screen, but do you have that same face to face? No. You have to make due with the supplies you have because if you feel a certain way thru a phone... you should have it in person. Especially if there's history... Especially where you HAVE met. Some people put too much emphasis on NOW, everybody gets to be so obsessed with time that they forget what its in front. We have to... We should cherish the moments that we have on this earth, cuz while we romanticize time so much, we fail to realize that TIME is LIMITED...

But then again... Maybe its just me.

I asked the person, "What is it that is making you afraid?" She replied, "It's Not Bout Being Afraid. Its About Being Realistic." Sometimes keeping it real goes wrong, and you miss the things we care about the most. Cause we want to be real... I'm not saying be naive, or be oblivious... I'm not saying keep it real, or a 100 [as these cool kids are saying these days]... I say be true to yourself and your feelings...Cause at the end of the day, that's all you have anyway.

But then again... Maybe its just me.

Maybe she wasn't that smart after all...

"Nigga You Gay..." -Riley Freeman

Now normally, I dont object to niggas sharing their feelings. I encourage it really. I mean, even I jot down my feelings on this blog site from time to time. But DAMN! Come on Starbury... You had it all... The Money... Money and the Cars... Cars and the Clothes... The HOES... I suppose... Damn it, if you won a ring... You might've been SUCCESSFUL. But look at you now, weekly shows on ustream, and you aint even signed to no team... And you crying and ish while yo homeboys clowning you in the background singing? Damn man... That shit is TRAGIC. To KIRK FRANKLIN no doubt! I mean, I would've put on some MARVIN SAPP... or some HEZEKIAH WALKER... maybe even some MAHALIA JACKSON! But that R.Kelly/Kirk Franklin/Bono and Mary J shit was straight up NOT GANGSTA! "That was so NOT GANGSTA!" [If I can borrow a quote from "The Boondocks"]. And the whole time I'm watchin this shit, I'm sayin... "Damn, these niggas STILL singing behind him... and he STILL CRYING!" It was so sad, it got to be funny... almost funnier than DRAKE fallin down on stage [GET WELL SOON DRIZZY!] but then, it just got to be downright frightening... When all the money goes and fans stop cheering, this is could be you... Hell, this might be SHAQ in a couple months when he retires.

It just goes to show you about being a celebrity... Like Dave Chappelle said, "One minute the crowd loves you, next minute you standing on top of a van dancing wondering 'What the FUCK happened?'"... IRONY.

I hate to say it man but...

Steph...

"Nigga you GAY."

Everything Is Under Control...

Okay, I've been talking about this album I've been working on for a while. So to put it plainly, its been a [LABOR] of love. I was working on it... Then I stopped. Wrote more songs, then [STOPPED]. I admit, I fell [OUT] of [LOVE] with music for a minute. Nothing seemed right to me. And on top of that, I was listening to Drake's [SO FAR GONE] all the time. Not to say I don't like DRAKE. I do, but it was at a point where his music was influencing mine. Like every other song that I wrote sounded like his. So I stopped listening to music for a while and watched some movies and I got completely influenced by movies like "Antwone Fisher", "Goodfellas", "Purple Rain" [Naj's Personal Fave] and oddly enuff "The Manchurian Candidate". So one night while I'm looking for my [NEWPORTS], I see the DVD cover for the movie and the tagline says, "EVERYTHING IS UNDER CONTROL." And my mind starts to work in overload and I came to the result that EVERYTHING IS UNDER CONTROL. Even when you're surrounded in CHAOS, even when things are going wrong, you have to remind yourself: EVERYTHING IS UNDER CONTROL. I must've wrote 4 songs that week afterwards.

Everything Is Under Control is an album of new and old songs I was working on. I wanted to make a point to do that so you can hear how I was feeling before and after. One thing I am learning to do is to stop critiquing myself so much. I am SUCH my own WORST CRITIC that I tend to overthink things too much and I hurt myself in the end. So I'm just letting myself go and whatever happens, happens. Let the chips fall where they may. I feel as if I'm a couple more songs away. Maybe 2 to 3.... I wanna knock them out b4 I leave for Recruit Training. I think I havent had this much fun working on something since I worked with STIX! aka BLUsteel [NOW] so shout outs go to Lil Bubba, Twix, Charleston Cord, Marc-Lo, Big Sista Mira' and everybody who has been apart of the album so far. I've couldnt have done it without you.

Alot of people have influenced this album in some shape or form, whether I've met you on the fly, talked to you on the phone, ex-girlfriends, whomever... You've all been apart of this process in some shape too. Oh yeah, shout outs to NEWPORT for those many stressful nights, and GOOD ONES too. So here's a TRACKLIST of what's on so far:

1. Is It A Dream or a Nightmare [INTRO]*
2. Everything is Under Control [Produced by TWIX]
3. Congratulations [Produced by TWIX]
4. Charleston Girls [Produced by Charles Hamilton]
5. Celebrity [Produced by TWIX]
6. Angel [American Gangster Interlude] **
7. Houstalantavegas 2.0 ** [Produced by Noah "40" Shebib]
8. Dreams & Cocaine [Interlude from BLOW]
9. Got Yola w/Lil Bubba [Produced by Lil Bubba]
10. G Niggas Ride w/Twix and Black Robb [Produced by TWIX]
11. I'm on it w/TWIX [Produced by TWIX]
12. Still Fly w/Lil Bubba [Produced by...]

*May not be on album
**Interlude may be with song

And that's it... or that's all I can remember. I should have a link for you to download soon when I'm done. Hopefully that's by the weekend!

-Naj

[NINE]/11

The Blueprint [3]...Will Hit Record Shelves. And I will be in Parris Island longing to listen to it.
Ugh...

[SKITTLES] & [PINEAPPLE JUICE]

Okay... First I gotta give props to my homie Reni [check her out @ renjones.blogspot.com] on this story, so I felt like I had to give a different perspective...

So, streets is [TALKIN]... and you know the urban legends that come with sex:

• If you drink Mountain Dew or Mello Yello, ya d*ck gets smaller because of the "yellow 5" ingredient.
• Ginseng makes you longer and bigger and last longer

And to my surprise, If you take ALTOIDS then the head is GREAT! [my homegirl told me that today]

But this comes from an interview with Trey Songz [YUUUUUP!] and Honeymag.com where he was talking bout sex and porn [I aint gon lie, I love PORN myself.]. So here's an excerpt that made me go in my WENDY WILLIAMS mode, "Fucccouttahere!"

"You know the rumor that if a girl drinks pineapple juice her sh*t tastes sweeter?Yeah I heard about that. Well you know the rumor that if a dude drinks pineapple juice (laughs)… I’m gonna tell you a funny story. I was eating skittles. One night, we went to the movies, me and my homegirl, and I was eating skittles and she (gave me head) that night, so two days later she was talking to her homegirl and she was reading that if her man eats skittles his cum tastes better. And she was tripping because I had ate skittles and she was like it tastes different. And I was like that’s some bullsh*t."
-Trey Songz

Yeah... Pineapple juice and skittles. I agree with Songz, that IS some bullshit but I give him mad props for being open in the interview. Not a lot of celebrities, much less dudes be honest with the public/media... But what do you think? Is that ish really possible? If so, I'ma have down some skittles [Red Bag] and give my girl some Pineapple Juice... EARLY!

Dear Brett Favre...

Dear Mr. Brett Favre,

First of all I wanna commend you on a GREAT career. You're a GREAT football player, definite Hall of Famer one day in the future. I mean come on, you've won a Super Bowl... Thrown to great recievers... You've seen alot of things during your career [The OJ Chase, Tupac, Biggie, The Unibomber, 9/11... amongst other events]. Hell, you were so fly, your first completed pass was to YOURSELF [when you played for the Falcons]. You're an ICON Brett. But I ask you, please... I implore to you... DO NOT PLAY ANOTHER FCKIN YEAR in the NFL. Just stop man, STOP. You're paid. I mean, I understand "The Love of The Game"... We went thru that with MJ [TWICE.] and Hakeem Olajuwon. Hell, we had to sit thru that damn Kevin Costner movie, [ironically called, FOR THE LOVE OF THE GAME]. But Brett, you've had it. You're done. I mean the Jets experiment was a good thing up until you started showing your age and missed the playoffs. And I wont front, I enjoyed the soap opera drama that ensued before you signed with them.

But, lets be real... You weren't gonna sign with the VIKINGS. You would've been lynched once you stepped foot in Green Bay. Your kids go to school there... Come on dude. Be real. You wouldn't have made a difference anyway, because you would just hand it off to Adrian Peterson. You had no recievers [Sidney Rice, USC WHAT UP!?] It would've been a ho-hum year. So the surgery, the rehab was for what? Just to tell the coach, " you didn't think you had enough in you to get through a full season."? Damn yo. Now he gotta do damage control with his other 2nd tier QB's... But it aint yo fault Brett. I dont blame you...

It's that damn "Love of the Game" BS yall players throw around when you can't come to grips with reality... oh yeah, that's called "DENIAL".

So chill in Mississippi Brett. Cut some grass... Fish... Do some more Wrangler Jeans commercials... Get your dough before you get that award in Canton. Just don't bring your ass back on an NFL playing field... Unless your coaching or what not...

Sincerely Yours,
Najee R. Browman

This Album...

Is [FI-YAH...] No Lie...

Simple Misunderstandings... [READY FOR LOVE]

So, today I was on FB [Facebook for the initial and website impaired] and I was talking to my [BIG HOMIE] Darbz [gimmegoodbrain.blogspot.com] about a problem I was having when a friend of mine popped up on the chat screen. We chatted for a minute, with the usual small talk and I was rambling about a sudden need to talk to a girl at night. IDK why, I just like talking to a girl b4 I go to sleep. I mean, we don't have even talk about SEX, just a casual convo would suffice. Me and were talking about what kind of girl I wanted and that description changes about every 3 weeks. But I was talking and she got kinda quiet. Then she started to talk in gibberish. So I told her speak english. She proceeded to tell me that she would LOVE to have that kinda thing with me [or something like that] but she can't due to her previously having a TRYST [look it up...] with my best friend.

I didnt want her to feel like it was a bad thing to entertain the thought of starting something, so I told her about another situation me and him had, which actually turned out good. NO BEEF or nothing, even though she didnt like me hanging with him [Which I ignored that request] but anywayz she was lyke, "EWWWL! Yall nasty!" and I replied, "It wasn't like we planned this... like we passed her around." She answered, "Yes you did." I got frustrated because she didnt understand the situation... So I said, "UGH... Never Mind." in disgust. But I didn't mean it like that...

What I'm tryna say is that she's a cool person, and I would entertain the thought of talking to her, and I understand her point about the best-friend law [which should be thrown out cuz people do it anyway] but I didnt mean to snap at her [even thru chat]. So I don't know... So I apologize for the whole convo... I wish it didnt happen cuz now I wouldnt think of what could be...


so now I'm lyke... "Damn."

Ready For Love - India Arie

Movie I Gotta See B4 I Head Out To Parris Island...

Seth Rogen and Adam Sandler? Drama in a Comedy? Can't Lose...

[vid] Blueprint 3 Intro: Live in [CHICAGO]

I'm Pretty Sure... I'm Pretty Sure... (c) Charles Hamilton

Ok.
So I'm guessing a lot of peoples saw the myspace update and told a friend to tell a friend: Naj was engaged. [Damn Tom and his invasion of privacy...] Or maybe I underestimated the word of mouth. Either way... It had me shook. Because I actually sat and thought about it and maybe "ENGAGEMENT" was a bit hasty. I'm sorry... It just seems that way. I'm about to turn 22 [17 days by the way...] and I everytime I think I have it down, I find out that I HAVE NO IDEA WTF I'm doing. None. Goose Egg. Nada. Nil. But I try... and I try to figure it out. I realize that maybe my MARRIAGE blog I wrote about might have sent me on that road. Where I felt like I wanted to get married. I still want to get married... SOMEDAY. Probably before 26. But not 30. or after 26. Now, I'm just rambling.

Either way... I'm not trying to say... IDK what I want to say. But right now, JULY 3RD... Do I want to get married? Yes. No. I'm pretty sure. Yes. I do. But not now. Maybe after BASIC TRAINING with the Marines... Maybe a year after that. IDK. But right now... I guess I would love to have a LONG LASTING RELATIONSHIP.

There's a lot of things I would like to improve before I jump into the marriage ring. Like... A lot of things. But I'll keep you posted...

RECAP: JULY 20TH, 2008

At CANISHA's house. Canisha's step father gave a blunt to take to the dome. No liquor. But I had a VODKA/ORANGE mixed drink. Got HIGH outta my mind... And had sex with Canisha. Alot that night. Davien was crying about his kids that were lost to miscarriage. He was drunk of Mad Dog 20/20... And um... That's it... Nothing too important, other than I was with the person I knew that I loved at that moment. And we were having a child... and we were against the world...

I would like to have a serious conversation with that guy. Because... He needed to know that he'd be okay... That he would survive... That even though he LOVES this girl, that they were too young to fight EVERYTHING that would come their way.... But somehow, he'll get thru it. He has no choice...

@MsToshay

I wish I could've wrote this for you awhile ago...

So when I describe how I feel about ya you don't feel like you was the last to know.

But I been peepin game since we was high schoolers

I been wantin you, but I knew I wasn't the coolest...

But back then I had another HEATON PLACE obsession

Y'know way back when? I seem real wack back then

But back to the present, a spitting image of HEAVEN.

If PERFECT had an image, you'd be its reflection

I know I may not have the EXCLUSIVE clothes and kicks...

But I could be the one you EXCLUSIVE with...

Ima say it: I'm the kinda dude you can have a FUTURE with.

But I as I digress, I know this process...

And let me suggest, I'm the BEST by FAR

I don't "American Idol"-ize, You can find me "Dancing With The Stars"

Let me take you to the top, and you'll see aint no stoppin it...

While I rock it, have you realize who you rockin with...

Let ya kiss melt in my mouth like chocolate

With ya hair and nails done up, girl you got your act together

You get the thumbs up, your raw footage is uncut.

I see your beauty is UNTOUCHED, So for anybody to come across it is DUMB LUCK.

Too many hard shames, the hardest one is saying goodbye

 Look here, time is money so let me save you some time

And if you got a spare dime, fully understand I'm a rare find 

You know, so pick a day and pick a place and we there for sure.

Show you something different, something international

Cuz it seems to me, that you a queen to be

You mean girl, but you don't mean to be

So if you can see the future, then that means you can see me.

I'm feeling ya vibe, All I'm asking for is some time...

I'll give you the swisher, so we can both feel the high

Ya dreams look like they ready to fly, but the question is are you ready to ride?

I wish I could've wrote this for you awhile ago...

So when I describe how I feel about ya, you don't feel like you was the last to know.

But I'ma type this still though...

Nothing left to lose, so here goes...

This Is... [This Is...]

Briana Latrise... And in my opinion, she has the most SEXIEST mind. EVER.

Plus, her blogs are ILL.

And she likes the same liquor as me.

So that makes her ILL...

[brianalatrise.blogspot.com]

-end

Dr. Carmen Hayes

[Door Opens...Shuts]

[Dr. Hayes]

Good Morning Najee...

[Naj]

What's Good Doc?

[Dr. Hayes]

So you're getting married today right? And yet, you've come to see me. How do you feel about

that?

[Naj]

Really... I feel um, ANXIOUS. NERVOUS.

[Dr. Hayes]

Ah, ANXIETY.

[Naj]

I mean, ANXIOUS about starting a new life. Making a family. Y'know, leaving all the bullshit behind me? So, I'm nervous.

[Dr. Hayes]

Nervous? C'mon Najee, you're a big boy now. Your wife is beautiful. You're sounding like a bit of a BITCH. You can do this... Did you find a best man yet?

[Naj]

Did you just call me a... Never mind. Best man? Um, I can't decide between two.

[Dr. Hayes]

Well, if you find one then you find one. If you dont, you dont...

[Naj]

I mean, um... I gotta have a best man. But of course I gotta talk to em and feel em out. He gotta be responsible with the ring and...

[Dr. Hayes]

Rings? What do you need a ring for? I mean its not like its a REQUIREMENT or anything.

[Naj]

Yeah, but I thought that the rings were a...

[Dr. Hayes]

So what else is your mind?

[Naj]

Well, I know I gotta start practicing my vows and everything....

[Dr. Hayes]

Really? Are you writing your own?

[Naj]

Yeah

[Dr. Hayes]

I would'nt do that. Nope. Not me... I could barely remember the vows that the minister had me repeat.

[Naj]

Really?

[Dr. Hayes]

Yes. Anything else Najee?

[Naj]

Well, the real question I have is... What if y'know, I find myself in a situation and I'm with my boys and they chillin wit some girls or we're in a club...get tempted to...

[Dr. Hayes]

Talk to her. Fuck her.

[Naj]

Excuse me... What?

[Dr. Hayes]

Sleep with her Najee. Gosh, just sleep with her. Or you could sleep with me... Nobody will know.

[Naj]

Sleep with you? Are you NUTS!? If I do that, I already know what that'll lead to.

[Dr. Hayes... Voice Distorted]

What? Back Here? With Me?

[Naj]

What the FUCK! NO! Come on man! I'm trying to do right!

[Dr. Hayes... Voice Distorted]

What's the matter Najee? Having some doubts? You'll never leave me... We will always be together... You need no girl but me Najee...

[Naj]

No... No! No! NO! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

[Alarm clock sounds...]

[Naj]

What? Ah.... Shit.

[Cut To Eminem's "3 A.M"]

-This was inspired by "Dr.West" a skit performed by EMINEM on his RELAPSE CD. And if you didnt know: Carmen Hayes is an ADULT FILM STAR. Well... My FAVORITE ADULT FILM STAR.

The Doctor is In...

This Album...

is breaking down the walls of "Writer's Block"...

Boomerang: A Manifesto of Some Sort.

**Naj's Note

I made a CONSCIOUS DECISION not to write about KOBE, or the LAKERS winning, Or anything of that sort. But a congratulations go out to dem niggas... [Though it was Trevor Ariza who saved yall asses. That is all.]

There are nights, where something so simple as watching a movie can bring an epiphany. Maybe I shouldnt even say that word because I believe its something we always knew about all along, so we recieve these REMINDERS at the oddest of times. Months, even years pass by before we get that REMINDER and moan about or BITCH about what we lost or what was important to us. And it is such a moment whereas LAST NIGHT, I finally recieved mine.

At the end of this week, it will be 4 going on 5 months where I have been single. Let me correct myself: SINGLE without having SEX. Now I believe there will be a few disbelievers at the screen like "Pssh, whatever nigga", but I tell you... My testimony is TRUE. In the months I have been single, I have not had SEX. I do remember my last partner, location and time. And I can tell you afterwards... I threw it all away. On a Whim, no doubt. I was seeing a girl. A GOOD GIRL. A GREAT GIRL. She cooked, catered to my needs, had the same interests and everything. But, just as suddenly when I began to doubt myself and that relationship. I met someone. My "Jacquelyn Broyer", and I was hooked. I'd wanted her since COLLEGE. She was gorgeous. Sexy. Everything I wanted. And now I have the opportunity to be with her? I went for it. Leaving everything behind in the dust.

Needless to say, the relatonship in itself was a DISASTER. Now I've jumped fences to see if the grass was greener on the side countless times... But DAMN. And as for the girl I left behind? She moved on. That's nothing new, but she did it in a such a harsh way that made me upset. We had nothing to say, we didnt speak. NOTHING. She was recently in an accident/tragedy and I prayed that she was okay. She was, but as I was scheduling to go see her... She told a friend of mine that she didnt want me there. I was HURT, MAD, ASTONISHED, and BEWILDERED. I finally acknowledged the fact that I didnt exist to her. And that upset me to the very core. Cuz I figure I'm a pretty MEMORABLE guy. But NARCISISM aside, I was jealous. How come she could do it, and I couldn't? Why cant she be another distant memory, another notch on the belt, another conversation over beer and cigarettes? Because she got THROUGH. She did. And I had cared. Couldnt she had seen that I cared? But I see I only cared for myself. And I realize that jumping from one hoop to the next when I was good for nothing wasn't smart. How could I try MONOGAMY or COMMITTMENT or be HONEST, when I was none of those to both of those girls? Better yet... HONEST to myself?

I wont lie though. I have LOVED. I've LOVED hard. And I have LOVED & LOST. On this highway we call LIFE, we expect to go through speedbumps of love. But me though, have been on a much bumpier ride. Because I'm so...in LOVE with the thought of love that I treat em like random bus stops on the way. I'm always looking for the next, with one foot out the door. I've let GOOD ones go. GREAT ones even... And I dont think it ws ever about me LOVING them. It was me LOVING them the right way. The way I was supposed to. Eddie Murphy's character talked about love in the movie "BOOMERANG" and Halle Berry's character challenged him with, "You think you know about LOVE? I'm so sick of men using LOVE like its a disease! Love shouldve brought your ass home last night!" And we as men HAVE NOT been home lately. Its funny, I once told an ex of mine that when I was with her, it felt like "home'. I had meant it. But i dont know if I would mean it now. I dont know how I feel now. I dont trust myself to fall in love, because I think I find it in every girl that I meet. But when I do LOVE again, I want to be SCARED. I want to be MISERABLE. I dont want to BREATHE...

I don't know where I had planned to go with this, or what point I was trying to make. I just wanted to say something. Maybe share how I felt...

Oh and that reminder? It wasn't a girl from my past... It wasn't past mistakes... It was REASSURANCE...

It was LOVE.

"That's TOO FAR NIGGA!" - KanYe West

"And My [BARS] Are As [HEAVY] as a [T-O-N]"

-Charles Hamilton "Awesomely Sweet"

I'm thinking my blogs are gonna start off like that from now on. Y'know, like the beginning of "The Wire"? Maybe I'm losing you... Anywayz, there is really nothing going on in LIFE right about now. It took the NBA Finals to OT of Game 3 to somehow captivate my attention. Honestly, I just loved seeing Pau Gasol get amped and look like he was gonna beat Mickael Pietrus' ASS. That was HYPE for me. And it was nice to see a DEREK FISHER appearance in the GRAND FASHION that he kills niggas from deep [You can't give him that much space Jameer.] My dude Marc-Lo has been getting on me for not being that interested in the FINALS, but I'm like "Who the fck is playing? The Lakers? [WOW!] The MAGIC? [WHO?]" I'm sorry, I for one is not gonna jump on them bum niggas bandwagon cause they beat LB23 and Co. [The CAVS]. Cause really, NIKE COMMERCIALS or not... I really wanted to see LeBron Vs. Kobe. Kobe Vs. Lebron. Black Mamba Vs. King James. WHAT HAVE YOU! I wanted to see it, but the Refs and conventional wisdom was like, "Owwww! FUHGED-ABOUT-IT" [Another CH line]

Anywayz, this series is to me is nothing but everybody dickriding. Yeah, I said it. DICKRIDING. Niggas who aint NEVER watched a MAGIC game and only know Dwight Howard and claiming them is a DICKRIDER. Niggas who appear in LeBron NIKE commercials and then proceed to make a whole song to KOBE BRYANT is... A DICKRIDER [Hi WAYNE.] Like the nigga aint never put up 40 on a team before? FUCKOUTTAHERE! Let me stop before I go on CHRIS ROCK rant like he did on Luda's CD... [HILARIOUS!] But honestly though, REP who you wanna REP and move on. I myself, a CELTICS [and closet KNICK] fan aint really fazed by it all and I picked it soon as the the NUGGETS fell: The LAKE-SHOW in 5. It's 3-1... and I'm looking like a muhfuckin PROPHET.

I digress, TWITTER is a crazy lil thing man. Me, I was tired of loggin on just to TWEET so I d/l'd TWEETDECK. And its convient as a muhfucka... yeah as a muhfucka... I can FACEBOOK and TWEET all fckin day. Niiiice. I got a chance to holla at BRIANA LATRISE last night about Charles Hamilton/J DILLA/Detroit Bullshit and she really put me on point. Now if you dont know what's goin on, you aint a HIP-HOP head so I wont go into it. GOOGLE IT or GO ON allhiphop.com or something. And for the two replies she gave me, gave me all the more evidence I needed to prove me and BRIANA would be a CLAS-SICK item...

"Sheeeyah! And pigs would fly out my butt..."- "Waynes World"

So I'm headed to VA for my cuz's GRADUATION ["Good Morning Intro" plays distant in the background] and I'm happy for the little nigga as well as jealous. That nigga is goin to TOKYO for a fucking MANGA/ANIME internship. And plus, at a ripe age of 21 I feel kinda old. It was only yesterday when this nigga was like 13 following me around the mall and me and him could quote every BRAD and GEORGE line from "Ocean's Twelve'... Where does the time go? Honestly.

So... I believe my time is UP. Gotta head back to Marc-Lo's and get my clothes out the dryer for the trip. I dried them shits like 4 times already... DAMN! If they aint ready, when I get there Ionknow WTF imma do.

[end of transmission]

-get familiar.

NAJ

[Pre-Blog] That's Spectacular... I Guess.

That's Spectacular! from jeff on Vimeo.

Sky Might Fall

ok.. For the past couple weeks, I have NOT made a post to my blog, but I planned on it. I PROMISE YOU I did. But for some reason, I just didn't have the words to say what I wanted. I was afraid that maybe I wouldn't mean some of the words I said. That's kinda wierd, especially coming from me... A person who takes solace in his blogs. But, now I think I can kinda air some ish out.

So, I've been talking something CRAZY I was doing on the last blog. And that "crazy thing" is joining the MILITARY. Yup, the MARINES. I'm not lying, DEAD ASS. I'm joining the fucking MARINES. It bugged me out too, so I imagine the 2 people who probably reads this is lyke, "Naj, what the fuck yo? Word? Serious?" But yeah, I joined the Marines. I really felt that right now in my life, at the ripe age of 21 that I have to DO SOMETHING. I mean, Niggas out here is stagnant right now, doing NOTHING. And that was me: Smoking weed, playing spades and Madden @ Marc-Lo's, drinking and trying to record a mixtape. That was my life and I was determined to do something different. I was bugged out yo, when I was being SWORN in. I was like, "Naj, this is really happening." And since then, A nigga has been straight edge. No weed, a lil alcohol here and there, running 3 miles 3x a week. I mean, word! I'm doing it. I'm on my way. I see a change in myself that I've been dying to see. And that makes me happy.

As of late, I've been a few blogs... Just to kinda jog my blog writing and a blog that I've drawn to as of late is Charles Hamilton. You know him right? "Brooklyn Girls"? That nigga. He's so fckin dope. I really feel like me and dude could like have a Newport and just zone out musically or just have a DOPE conversation. I feel a lot of the things he says and I can HONESTLY feel him. I mean a nigga was homeless too for a short while, and his GRIND is ADMIRABLE. I've decided that when I get the money: CHARLES HAMILTON is gonna produce "N PLANE SIGHT: The Audio Motion Picture" or Executive Produce it, whateva. And it helps that his intern/photographer/chick who punched him in the face [which I didnt care] Briana Latrise is ABSOLUTELY GORGEOUS. I mean she just is... I mean looks is one thing... but her voice? Sends me over the edge. And that's all I'll say about it. Other than I want CHARLES HAMILTON to produce the album.

Speaking of the album, WRITING for that shit is absolutely FUCKING annoying! I truly believe that listening to "SO FAR GONE" really stifled me creatively. I mean cuz every song that I write sounds like fucking "SAY WHAT'S REAL" or "Uptown" amongst others. I mean FCK! I mean, I didnt have this kind of problem when I was writing "NRB" except for the WRITERS BLOCK. And when me and Toya broke up or started going through our problems as well as the TJ bullshit, I just threw that album away... With 2 songs left to write. Dumb, I know. But that was just a period that I didnt wanna put on wax. And now, I'm just fcking LOST. I have a partial tracklist and I don't know what the fuck I'm doing. So I decided to listen to a lot of OTHER SHIT. CHARLES HAMILTON, KID CUDI, JAY-Z, KANYE WEST, A little bit of CLIPSE, CAM'RON's new joint and damn... what else? I'll know by the end of the blog.

As far as girls, I havent ben stressing the situation. That comes when it comes, so its whatever. Its like I'm hardly even talking to girls outside of a friendship or harmless flirting that I know will lead to NO WHERE... There is this woman named ESHA though...

FUCK! MOS DEF! That's it! Mos's new joint! THE ECSTATIC is VICIOUS...COLD... You must cop it.

So that's about it on the blog tip. It's 3:43 in the AM, and I got a loooong day ahead. So I'm out...

LOOK FOR THIS ON MYSPACE...

-NAJ

Naj's Excellent Journey on a Bill & Ted Tip...

So its not really that excellent, but in regards to what has happened in my 'hood the past cpl of weeks: [SHOOTINGS, MURDERS, DRUGS...] its definately the best next thing [STRIKE THAT...REVERSE IT- Willy Wonka]...

So after that and a cpl of other things, I decided to enlist in the MARINES. *GASPS!* Say WHAT NAJ!? Say WORD!? WORD. I joined the Marines. And I actually think its a good idea considering a lot of shit thats been goin on lately around the way. Sometimes, you gotta better yourself, even if it means goin outside ya comfort zone.

And this KNOCKS ME SO OUT OF MY COMFORT ZONE. The MARINES? MILITARY? I never thought I'd do it, but now I'm like WHY NOT DO IT? Why not switch my lifestyle up... Good Pay, good benefits... all leading to a: BETTER LIFE. Outside of fcking S. Carolina... And far away from fcking WOODSIDE MANOR.

So I want it all...

THE MONEY...
MONEY AND THE CARS...
CARS AND THE CLOTHES...

EXCEPT...THE HOES...

I suppose.

Mostly, Shit... I just wanna be successful...

But hell, I wanna make it to 22 y.o...

"Not As Ominous As It Looks"

Greetings...

From Ross' Moms kitchen!

Um, just letting yall know, I'm sorry I havent been able to re-up on the blogs as of late...
A DUDE HAS BEEN BUSY...

So here's a random update...

• "N PLAIN SIGHT" is renamed... "EVERYTHING IS UNDER CONTROL" that's the new title...
• STAY LOW KEY PRODUCTIONS... That's all I will say at the moment.
• NAJ = RETURN... You do the math if you know me.
• WHAT UP TO TWIX, LIL BUBBA, WIL STREETZ aka CEO N.O, Gizzle...
• FREE BLACK ROBB [Not the rapper...]
• DRAKE at Georgia Southern soon... I might [NOT] be going... Maybe...
• Writing for album and working on MIXTAPE... TWIX HOLLA AT ME!
• THERE'S
• NOTHING
• LEFT
• FOR
• ME
• 2
• [SAY]

So there... Enjoy...

and YOU'RE WELCOME.

STUNT 101: BENTLEY GT IN MATTE BLACK

Courtesy of Pharrell Williams...

You're welcome.

A Bit of An EXPLANATION...

Okay.

So I haven't wrote a blog in a BILLION years. A lot of ish has happened in the past couple weeks.

So, I thought I found the "right one" [Hence: LETTER TO SHAKIRA] but unfortunately, or maybe not... She was not. Not to say anything bad about her, because I still CARE about her; but HOW it ended was completely a headache I didn't need to deal with. What sealed the deal, was her saying that she's getting married... on 3-6-10... She actually sent that THROUGH a TEXT! [Somewhere, I can hear my ex-girlfriends around the world laugh and cheer in unison...] I have that text saved in my phone as a reminder. That all things that glitters is NOT gold. Sometimes, PERFECT can be IMPERFECT... Pretty much, that's all I have to say about that.

"N PLAIN SIGHT" is on a HIATUS. But I'm still recording. I got wit some guys [STAY LOW KEY PRODUCTIONS] and we're working on a compilation CD at the moment, and we've also been in constant communication with Geffen Records... So look out for that, keep your fingers crossed. I'll get back to yall later... UNC game is on.

UNO. EASY!

Back II The Future...

Remember these bad boys? I don't know if you lived under a rock or something but these babies are Back To The Future Part II... Y'know? When Marty gotta go to the future and save his kids? Or something like that... Remember the scene where he hoverboarding around? This is what he was rockin'. Now IDK if they're gonna release em, because they were some rumors goin round in the mill, but these joints are fresh... Ugh, Marty McFly... These were so before they time...

Stunt 101: Lamborghini Insecta

Digital Girl of the Week: Dollicia Bryan

So, its FRIDAY... and I owed you guys a Digital Girl of the week, but I didn't have one! So I had to kinda research and that means I had to go thru my XXL mags HARD! But I soon remembered the XXL Eye Candy of the Year for 08'... Dollicia Bryan. I won't front: She held hip-hop videos down last year, appearing in Kanye's "Love Lockdown" and Weezy's "Got Money". Now, while those aren't the best evidence to judge [One being, that she's in the EXTENDED CUT for Love Lockdown AND 2, You can't really see Doll in the other video.] Now, besides spats with pint-sized rappers [Bow Wow what up?], Dollicia is trying to foray into acting [Naw...REALLY? Like every other VIDEO GIRL?]. While I don't exactly expect her getting OSCAR roles first go round... Hey, at least she aint rapping... [Sorry Angel...]

Letter To Shakira

Sunday March 1st, 2009.

The date my LIFE changed. The day that all my dreams were realized… It is the day YOU entered my life… OFFICIALLY. You’re no longer my friend, but my girl… my woman… my future wife [*hint hint*]. Hands down, you’re the BEST I ever had. In this short time, there’s no comparison to you. But, then again, it’s always been that way since first glance. I know this road is only going to get harder as we both are on a road to success, but I’m glad I’m in this car with you. My heart stops when you call me “BABY”, sparks shoot up my spine when you say “I LOVE YOU”.

I try my hardest to be the best MAN I can be, and that’s why sometimes my “SUPERMAN” efforts are ill-fated in some situations. It’s only because I want to help, so I give you words of encouragement so you’d know someone is behind you. I am your #1 fan, your GROUPIE… Words can’t explain how you do me. I am IN love with you… Words can’t even express how I feel for you. I am undoubtedly yours: NOW AND FOREVER. I look forward to building a life with you. I only wish you see what I see.

You say I’m your ‘HALO’ but YOU are my angel. The light at the end of the tunnel… You are not the target, but the arrow; Cupid’s arrow. I finally understand the lyrics and what they mean to you, and I only hope to please you. So… the Lord has answered my prayers and sent me you. After years of tests and failures, he brings me the best woman to get me on track. To support, to encourage, to guide… And she still manages to be so fly…

I Love You Shakira Ballard…

The Fear

This has been something in the making for a long time.

I've always said I was gonna do this.

It has always been my intention on doing this.

I just hadn't found the time. Nor felt the circumstances to be right...

But I've decided to do it NOW.

I'll tell you this. Starting your own mixtape is a VERY challenging thing. You set up beats, but you dont want the WHOLE thing to be beats from songs that everyone has heard. You go through the whole "writing before/writing during" process. You choose your best songs to record while allowing yourself to be spontaneous and make songs "on the fly". Then its recording. Cause you dont wanna do it grassroots in ya homeboy's closet. or "Hustle and Flow" style in ya moms basement or garage. But if the sound quality is there, and you got to the tools... I say go for it.

Through all these hurdles, I managed to decide to do it. But it wasn't until hearing Drake's "SO FAR GONE" that I completely went over the edge. I admit, I was waiting for something to inspire me, 808's and Heartbreak got me close...but not enough. "Comeback Season" got me closer... But it was "SO FAR GONE" that did it... I remember the moment: Late at night, listening to "Say Whats Real" and the line of, "My next girl standing by my EX girl, standing by the NEXT girl I'm fucking right now..." That sealed it. I immediately turned off the radio and started writing. I had been writing casually earlier, but now I was in a inspired rage. After I found my beats, called my boy Mike who usually makes beats for me... I linked up with another producer TWIX. And now you pretty much have the outline for your mixtape. I decided to call it, "N PLAIN SIGHT".

I named it that because a lot of things that we dont realize or really recognize is right in front of us namely, in plain sight. Whether its the right choice, right career, right location, the "one"... these things can all be in plain sight. Deep huh? This mixtape is like a diary of sorts, a chronicle of events that has happened in the past or at that moment.Cause there's alot I'll get off my chest. I just wanted to blog and tell you guys my plans, and as a show of good faith... I'll type out my TRACK LIST [LATER] to prove I'm not bs'in you...

So wish me luck...